Let’s Beat the Authoritarianism of “Me-Me-Me”

I’ve been thinking lately about how our world has grown so big—so externally loud—that we’ve lost sight of what matters most. In the wake of the recent gubernatorial elections here in New Jersey, I find myself reflecting not on ballots and parties, but on communities, on relationships, on the simple fabric of life we all weave together.

Because something important is missing.

The world is expanding—but our hearts are contracting

We live in a time when our identities are wrapped up in being right, in winning the spotlight, in acquiring the next thing. We scroll, we post, we shout. We measure ourselves by money, by likes, by standings. And the world gets bigger—bigger audience, bigger stage, bigger noise—but our inner lives shrink.

As Joseph Campbell once said:

“When we quit thinking primarily about ourselves and our own self-preservation, we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness.” Shareable+1

That transformation is what we’re missing. Instead we’re stuck in me-me-me.

Family, friends, neighbors … humanity

What happened to the basic connections? The dinner table. The neighborhood sidewalk. The simple “How are you doing?” to someone who lives next door. When everything becomes large—politics, identity, economy—we forget the small, tethered places where life actually happens.

In our race to be right, we forget to be kind. Disagreement becomes not a dialogue, but a threat. The person standing next to you becomes a “lesser” rather than a “different”. But ask yourself: your life experiences have shaped your belief system—so why can’t that be true for the person standing next to you?

Every person's definition of what is “right” or “wrong” is different because every person’s life experience is different. That doesn’t make it true for all—and it doesn’t make it wrong for them either.

Politics, elections, and the big stage

Here in New Jersey, the gubernatorial election didn’t just reflect policy; it reflected division. It reflected how our worlds have grown enormous—with cable news, social media, ideologies—but our compassion has stayed tiny. The louder our public fights get, the less we listen at home. The larger our platforms become, the smaller our hearts shrink.

And the result? Less real conversation. More posturing. More identity-walled off in echo chambers.
As Herman Melville put it:

“We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men.” Ellevate Network+1
Those are the fibers we’ve severed.

The shift we need: From What can I do for myself? to What can I do for others?

This is not about giving until you’re empty—it’s about recognizing that you’re part of something bigger than your own story. The strength of your brand, your voice, your place in the world? It doesn’t live in the limelight—it lives in how you serve quietly, how you choose “we” over “I”.

The first step to changing your thinking is changing your actions.
– Turn down the noise.
– Ask the person next to you about their story.
– Put your phone aside and have a cup of coffee—really listen.
– Invest in your neighbor, not just your network.
– Light the small fires of connection, rather than trying to blaze a signal flare off-the-grid.

Let’s beat the authoritarianism of “me-me-me”

Because make no mistake: self-centeredness is an authoritarian regime. It demands you confess allegiance to its flag: “I’m right. I’m first. I’m visible. I’m valuable.” But when we bow to that regime, we sacrifice the community, we sacrifice humanity.

As Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote:

“The more isolated a person is, the more destructive will be the power of sin over him …” outreachmagazine.com
Isolation is the currency of self-obsession. Connection is the currency of healing.

So here’s the call

Let’s shrink the world to the size of our living rooms, our street corners, our shared meals. Let’s remember our families, friends, neighbors. Let’s invite disagreement—not as a threat, but as a chance to hear another truth. Let’s embrace our different experiences as not obstacles, but as the texture of humanity.

Because the world may be big, but your life is not about oracles or broadcasts. It’s about human beings. It’s about the neighbor who waves. It’s about a community that loves, listens, cares.

If we want change—real change—then we don’t need bigger platforms. We need deeper hearts. We don’t need louder voices. We need kinder ears. We don’t need more followers. We need more service.

Let’s band together. Let’s stand in the “we”.

Because our world isn’t too big—it’s just out of focus.